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View Full Version : What's your honest opinion?


Weeping Willow
06-10-02, 07:04 PM
Okay, I'd like to hear y'all's honest opinion of this poem I wrote for my cousins.

There is magic in this place, that only he can see.

All his playthings are his best friends; imagination is his key

To far-off lands and times, that are known by no grown man.

The future of this world lies in the palm of his small hand.

So be careful what you teach this boy; mind what you say.

This boy sees what you do, and will do the same, someday.

So, what do you think? :confused:

Weeping Willow
06-11-02, 08:28 AM
Is it that bad? Seven people have read it, but no one's made any comments... :wah:

HeatherlyButterfly
06-11-02, 01:22 PM
i'm sorry sweetie. i'm pretty scarce around here anymore and the forum is really kinda slow. maybe people just don't know what to say....

i for one think it's great. it kinda captures the impressionability of children. good job!

Avatarus
06-11-02, 05:47 PM
Weeping Willow,

Don't feel bad if people don't respond right away (or at all) in this forum. I've posted things before and watched as the views went up but next to nobody replied.

I think your poem is wonderful... children learn what they and those around them live. The only negative thing i can think of is the ending seems a little abrupt. I don't know... it just seems like it needs another line or so to me (but I am not a poet... I am a musician... so I'm probably just being stupid right now :) ).

Thank you for sharing your work with us...

Avatarus

Laura
06-11-02, 07:40 PM
I like it, Willow.

You used some awesome symbolism in there... and my crazy musician mind wants to get a guitar and set that to music. Good job though, I really enjoyed it. :D

Weeping Willow
06-11-02, 10:50 PM
Thank you! I've been writing alot, lately. I think it's very calming, after a stressful day. Anyway, I'm really glad you like it! :D

Ashwee
06-17-02, 02:40 AM
OooOOOooh... very pretty.

Me likes.