Someone please give me advice......

[Nina]

I hope someone on this board can help me. First let me say I am a christian who goes to a pentecostal church, my husband is catholic but hasnt gone to the catholic church in ages. He has gone to my church w/me occasionally but he'll never say he "belongs" to a pentecostal church he always says hes catholic. Ok, with that said I had a baby in November. We decided we would both dedicate the baby in my church and christen the baby in the catholic church. (its very important for my husband--dont ask me why) The problem is my father refuses to go to the catholic church and I know if he does he will embarass me by saying stuff out loud. I know he is going to make a big deal about my decision to christen the baby also saying Im going to confuse her and why even do it when my husband doesnt go to the catholic church. My dad is the type not to keep his mouth shut and Im sure at the party afterwards he will say stuff. (He's embarassed me before w/his opinions) I really wish he wouldnt embarass me but there is no talking to him. I KNOW this isnt christian like and I dont really see the harm in christening my baby also. Isnt God God--no matter what church you go to. Someone please give me advice. Im sick thinking about this situation.

[Ann]

Hello Nina
The way you handle this can set a precedent for peace or for discord for bringing up your child. You and your husband are the baby's parents and the ones responsible to God for her care and well being. Other family members may mean very well and have valid concerns but the ultimate responsibility belongs to the two of you. There will be enough challenges with the differences in your two religious traditions without having also to please other people. However the Bible does tell us in Romans 12:18 "If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men." So let's see if we can figure out a possible way to handle this so that there can be peace.

You have already decided to have both dedication and christening. Is it possible that those who favor christening can be invitedd to the christening and those who favor dedication to the decication without making a big deal with either group about the other ceremony? This way your dad is not pressured to go to a church he finds distasteful and you minimize the potential for unpleasant words to be expressed. And at the same time family members on your husband's side are not pressured to attend the pentacostal ceremony. It is also possible to either have no party or have 2 small gatherings for the friends and family who the ceremony preceeding the gathering. I would guess you are not going to try to do both things on the same day.

Yes God is God but there are differences in doctrines that are very important too people and as you probably know there are basic truths like that one needs to personally accept Jesus as Savior not just believe in the historical fact of His existance.

God's word promises that if we ask Him He will give us wisdom and in posting you are asking so you and I can believe that He will do what He has promised and give you wisdom on how to handle this and other differences that come up in His love and in ways that will draw your husband more and more to Christ. God bless you and your little one.

[grandpa]

:angel: Dear Mizz Nina: Grandpa here. Your post is heart breaking. It would be nice if all family could get together for the dedication of a child. Here is the best advise that I can come up with.
First: Pray-Pray-Pray. Lift up this entire situation to the Lord.

Second: Have you talked to the pastor at the Pentecostal Church that you attend. I would recomend that you get an appointment when you have plenty of time. Get someone to keep the baby while you have a conference with the pastor. Tell him all-Everything that you have put in your post.
When geting counseling, No one should 'preach' back to you. You do not need it. You need good advise and recomendations on how to deal with this situation. In so far as you can, try to 'not' get into any yelling matches or hard discussions with anyone about this. Remember the biblical advise about 'A soft answer turning away wrath'.

Third. Do you have a good trusted family friend or relative who can help you through this ordeal?

In extension: Is there a pastor in the Catholic Church that you can talk to. Try this. Your Husband may listen to an official in the Catholic Church before anyone else.

In closing, do not just go away. Keep us posted. We care. Agape. Grandpa.:) :D :biggrin:

The Lord Bless you and keep you
The Lord make His face to shine upon you,
and be gracious to you:
The Lord lift up His countenance upon you,
and give you Peace.

[Nina]

Grandpa, I do in fact have an appt w/my pastor at the Pentecostal church today. He's a really nice man and I will speak to him about my situation. I know this is only the beginning of problems I will have with two different religions but its nice to know people out there care who dont even know me!!!!

[grandpa]

:angel: Dearest Mizz Nina: If I cannot be a comfort and offer encouragement, I will just go away. But I will offer as much help as I can. How about this.
You mentioned 'Problems with two different religions'. I do not think there will be any problems. If Ministers of two different faiths get together and/or counceling people who are hurting, there should be a union of the Holy Spirit for the good of the hurting person. I really believe that there is great healing for the entire situation--Soon. Keep going, keep looking up, Think positive, Pray without ceasing, You will overcome the problems. May the Lord Bless Greatly. Agape, Grandpa. :) :D :biggrin: :cool: